Tackling Your Insecurities Through Boudoir | Brooklyn Boudoir Photography

Last week, I guest blogged for the amazing Melissa, aka The Lace Appeal.  I am so impressed with this woman.  She is traveling the world finding the best brands of lingerie and sharing her wisdom with us.  Here is the piece I wrote, along with some photos from our shoot this past winter (who else wants a faux fur coat after seeing these photos?!) 

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As a boudoir photographer, I spend my life making sure that women see all the amazing things about themselves. I preach a lot about self-esteem and self-love but even so, I too sometimes lose the fight against my insecurities. I think all women do to a certain extent. It is so easy for us to look at other women and see their perfect figure, gorgeous hair, clear skin, etc… and yet, we have a really difficult time paying ourselves the same compliments we extend to others. We worry what other people think about us, we worry if we’re attractive enough, we worry that we’ll fail, we worry that we’re not good enough... Why?

Women have been conditioned to constantly think we need improvement or need to look a certain way to be thought of as beautiful. We’re threatened by “the big 4-0” because we’re afraid of being "past our prime." “Mom jeans” subtly communicate we’re off the market sexually. We’re told it’s undesirable to be larger than a size 6. With so many of these messages being thrown at us, it’s no wonder women internalize unrealistic physical expectations and struggle with self-image.

What I love about boudoir photography is that it's about more than beautiful & sexy portraits. It’s about celebrating yourself, embracing your womanhood and allowing yourself to be proud of the person you are – no matter where you are in life or how many pounds plus/minus your “ideal" weight you're currently at. So, while it may sound counter-intuitive, a boudoir shoot can help you overcome your insecurities. Let’s take a deeper look at how:

Boudoir photography focuses on the positive

It’s so easy to focus on what we wish were different about ourselves, but what about showing off what we LOVE ?  It’s more difficult, isn’t it?  And also not something many women feel they have “permission” to do — we are taught it’s not polite to brag, after all.  But at your boudoir shoot — BRAG GIRL!  Tell me what you love about yourself and let’s capture it!  It can be your eyes, your laugh, the small of your back… anything!  Remember your positive qualities, because keeping those at the forefront of your mind is the key to heathy self-esteem. 

When we are on set, I have a very strict “no negative self-talk” policy.  Before we are in the studio, however, you can tell me if there’s anything you are self conscous about and I will be mindful not to feature it too prominently in your shots.  This doesn’t mean I won’t photograph it.  To the contrary, always try to capture at least one fantastic shot of that feature you’re not in love it… just so you can see how beautiful your so-called flaws really are.  

Boudoir photography embraces who you are

Every one of us has “flaws" - even models and celebrities.  A great way to boost your confidence is to embreace these flaws.  This can be really hard to do, but bear with me.   What makes you different is what makes you interesting.  Hell, it’s what makes you YOU.  Your smile lines are remnants of the happy times you’ve had.  Your stretch marks may represent a pregnancy.  Your scars tell the story of a challenge you overcame.  Why would we want to erase those things?  Embrace all the parts of you, freckles, lines, jiggly bits and all, and see the beauty in them. They are what make you who you are, and they are wonderful.   And anyway, perfection is not only impossible, it’s boring. Trust me on this one: imperfect works. 

Get zhushed up a little

The same way standing up straight or smiling can make you feel more proud and more positive, the way you appear in your mind affects your confidence.  This is why when you feel you look good, you tend to feel good.  That is what a boudoir session is really about: FEELING good. Taking care of yourself makes you feel better, leaving you with fewer low confidence days. Of course, it doesn’t mean becoming obsessed with appearance, but some me-time, a blow-dry, and your favorite pair of jeans goes a long way in improving your headspace.  It’s not about what others think… it’s about what you see in the mirror. 

Take a compliment

Instead of saying “thank you” when we get a compliment, women tend to shrug it off or disagree. If someone says “how did you get that flat stomach?” we’re more likely to respond with “it’s not flat, I have a jelly roll,” rather than saying thank you and moving on. It’s as if we’re embarrassed to be proud of ourselves.  When I am shooting a boudoir session, I can’t help but tell the woman in front of my lens how beautful they are.  A lot.  Maybe that’s tough for some popele to hear, but it’s completely sincere.  I truly believe that all women are beautiful, and I take real pride in bringing that beauty out.  So when I, or anyone else, pays you a compliment, I challenge you simply to say "thank you" and leave it at that. No follow up statements or caveats.  You’re welcome. ;)

See yourself through someone else’s eyes    

What would you tell a friend who was worried about some new wrinkles or a few extra pounds?  You would probably tell her that she’s beautiful in spite of that stuff!  We are always our own harshest critics.  When you start to feel down about yourself, try to think of how you’d talk to a friend, and try to extend that same kindness to yourself.  Give yourself assurance, give yourself compassion.  At photo reveals so many of my client say, “I can’t believe that’s me!”  Seeing yourself through my lens can help you take a step back from your insecurities and see yourself in a new light, as if you are looking through a friend’s eyes. 

Fight the fear

How exhilerating is it when you conquer something you’re afraid of — like a rollercoaster or jumping off the highest diving board?  You feel like you can take on anything!  THAT is the feeling a boudoir shoot gives you.  Getting photographed in your skivvies might sound like a classic Freudian nightmare but believe me when I say it is so much less scary than you think it will be.  Even my most nervous clients warm up within the first 5 minutes, and end up having a blast.  If you’re thinking of boudoir for yourself and you have some insecurities with your body, think of why you DO want to do a shoot for yourself, because ultimately the “Why I want it” should out-weigh the “What I’m scared of.”  Consider it an adventure!  If it both excites you and scares you at the same time, then I say jump in with both feet!

Choose your photographer wisely and then trust them

While I do believe every woman should have a boudoir session, this doesn’t mean they should run out and have a shoot with the first photographer they find. It’s important to find a photographer that sees you for you and who makes you feel comfortable, because as much as a good photographer can boost the self-esteem, a bad photographer can be damaging to it, so DO YOUR RESEARCH.  Do the women on their website look comfortable?  Can you talk to the photographer ahead of time?  Do they have the same philosophy on retouching as you?  These are all important things to think about when choosing your boudoir photgrapher. 

And once you select your photogaher, go ahead and trust them.  Remember we are professionals in this area for a reason.  We are experts in styling, lighting, and other things to make you look your best.  Don’t know how to pose? No problem!  It’s my job to show you!  It may feel awkward, but I promise you I’ll make you look great on camera.   

Every woman deserves to feel beautiful.  And here’s the secret: you ARE beautiful, with all your so-called flaws, just as you are.  You won’t find perfection or happiness by losing a few more pounds, because that’s not where you self-worth lies.  Real beauty is much deeper than that.  

Ready to tackle YOUR insecurities?  Contact me and let's get you in for a shoot!

xoxo, Stephanie

How to Prepare for Your Boudoir Shoot | New York City Boudoir photographer

Should you get your bikini waxed?  Is tanning a "yay" or a "nay"?  Not sure what to bring? 

These are just a few questions my clients wonder about in the weeks or days leading up to their boudoir photo shoot. As your boudoir photographer, it's my job to be sure I've answered as many questions as possible before you even ask them!  In the efforts to help you better understand what preparing for a boudoir photo shoot entails, here is a small excerpt of tips I offer my clients in my “Boudoir Prep Guide” that I send prior to their boudoir session.

One Week Before

If you wax, do so a good five days before your session to avoid red bumps and irritation.

Get a mani and pedi if that's your style.  Polish-free nails are absolutely ok too, but chipped polish will bug us both, and is tough to fix in photoshop.  Clean, neat nails, whether manicured or not, are key. 

Drink plenty of water so that you are hydrated. This will ensure your skin is luminous. Contrary to popular belief, drinking lots of water also helps to minimizing bloating.

Another way to minimize bloating is to cut back on salty and fried foods, alcohol (sorry to say!) and anything that might make you gassy.

Pin some of your favorite boudoir shots and poses on Pinterest & send them my way. The idea isn't to duplicate the exact photos but it will give me a good feel for what you like (and we can always try to get close to the inspiration). Follow me on Pinterest @brooklynboudoir and we can even create a "secret" mood board together.

Please don’t go tanning ESPECIALLY if you don't normally tan!  Tan lines and burns do not translate well on camera, nor does burned skin. To that end, please do NOT spray tan either! It can come out blotchy  or orange in photos, and might rub off on your clothes, or the bedding.  Not a good look.  You don't need a tan to look great!

Plan to bring a neutral colored panty, a black one and at least one thong with you to your boudoir session. Depending on the shot (and your comfort level) your panties may be showing in your photos… so leave the panties that you’ve had for the past 20 years with the overstretched elastic waist at home 😉

One Day Before

Moisturize and shave - Unless you’re going for that au naturel look, which is totally fine by me! However, if that’s not the style you’re looking for, please do remember to shave and moisturize prior to the session.  A few stray hairs can be removed here and there but we don't want to rely on that.

Get plenty of sleep!  Easier said than done, I know!  But do your best to get some rest so you look and feel your best.

The Day Of Your Session

Please don’t wash your hair the day of the session.  Even refrain from using dry shampoo. Freshly washed hair isn’t as easy to work with for our stylist, and we want to assist them in creating your fabulous look!  That said, greasy hair isn't good either!  "One day" hair is ideal for hair styling. 

Moisturize!  You should arrive with your face washed, makeup free and well moisturized.  Your should moisturize your body as well.  You don't need anything fancy -- classic Jergins or even coconut oil works great!

Aim to show up 10 minutes prior to your scheduled appointment.  There's nothing like showing up late, being frazzled and feeling stressed to ruin your day.  Subways run late, ubers bail, life happens!  Planning to show up earlier than planned with help you feel relaxed and start the session off right.  

Wear loose-fitting clothing like yoga pants, leggings, or a jumpsuit to your shoot. Don’t wear anything tight-fitting that will leave red marks on your body (such as skinny jeans or fishnets). Wear a loose-fitting shirt and either a sports bra, tank with a built-in bra or no bra at all! The goal is to avoid red marks or indentations on the skin. 

Wear clear deodorant (or no deodorant… I won’t judge). You don’t want white getting on your clothes or having those white deodorant bits in your underarms.

Eat something light. I know it’s hard when you want to feel your slimmest but being hungry during your session will not be fun.  Without a small meal, you'll feel low energy which will make you look & feel tired. You will also tire out faster and crash by the end of your session. A boudoir session can feel like hard work if you’ve never done one before! You need to eat something, even if it’s just an energy bar.

Stretch!  Sounds crazy but some of the poses can be challenging.  It's almost akin to a workout!  Many of my clients tell me they are sore the next day!  So your shoot is a good excuse for skipping the gym that day

Put yourself outside of your comfort zone. Many people plan to be entirely covered up during their session, and that’s totally okay if you want to go that route!  But once the session gets going, many ladies start to have fun and get a little more daring! It’s all up to you how much you want to show.  I highly recommend pushing your comfort level because there is no one to judge you and this could be a once in a lifetime experience for you.  Remember, this session is for you and about you. So regardless of how much you decide to show or not show, it’s all about creating fun, sexy, and classy photos.  Many times the magic happens when you let your guard down and let all those pesky insecurities go.

MOST IMPORTANTLY – Relax and take a deep breath! It’s okay to feel a little nervous before your session but please don’t worry – you are in good hands!

A boudoir session is unlike any photo shoot you have ever done before and it does require a little bit of preparation!  My goal is to ensure that you feel great, look great and that you fall in love with yourself in the process.  Hopefully this post helps you feel more confident about preparing for your shoot and ease any doubts you may have, and this is just a small portion of it.  Don't worry -- I got you! 

Prior Clients -- what advise do you have for those about to have a boudoir shoot?  I'd love to hear in the comments below!  

Never had a session, and feeling more confident about one?  Contact me below and I can answer any other questions you may have!

xoxo, Stephanie

Cute to Sexy | New York Boudoir Photography

"I have always considered myself 'cute', but I never would have described myself as sexy." 

Ahhh yes. I've heard it a hundred times before...the ol' "I'm really not "sexy."

What most people don't realize is that "sexy" doesn't have much to do with appearance. It's about the way you carry yourself. It's about confidence. It's that feeling you get when you know you're amazing.

Ms. J came to me with a few different wardrobe options, one of which had been gifted to her by her hubs.  It was a a garter belt and thigh high set, and there was something almost "Kiss of the Spider Woman" about it (I am exposing my musical theatre geekdom now). She never wore it, and i could tell she felt not quite herself in it. Usually, if you don't feel comfortable in the wardrobe I would say don't wear it, but she looked SO.DAMN.GOOD in it I couldn't resist snapping a few shots.  We laughed about it, and said that if she didn't love the images in the end, she didn't have to keep them.  But guess what?  The images were AMAZING and were some of her favorites!

That's the thing about stepping out of your comfort zone -- you never know where it will take you!  And would could be more exciting that that?  With me directing your poses, facial expressions, and encouraging you the entire time, you are guaranteed to feel SEXY through the whole process. Especially seeing your photos. 

“To me, sexy is the confident energy a person produces. Sexy is the comfortable feeling of being who you are. Sexy is not just having beautiful lips, legs, and arms. It is beyond that. Sexy is soul.”

— Karina Smirnoff

It was an absolute pleasure to show Miss J just how sexy she is.

I'm so grateful for clients like Miss J that can come into the studio, trust me to do what I do best, and who finally get to see the SEXY in there. Because the more you experience, the more you can carry that confidence, that SEXY with you every single day. 

xoxo, Stephanie

Ready to take it from Cute to Sexy?  Do it for YOU & drop me a line! 

Meet Stephanie | Your Brooklyn Boudoir Photographer | NYC Boudoir Photography

Hello!  I'm Stephanie, the photographer behind Brooklyn Boudoir.  I realized that while I have shared some intimate details about myself with you, I haven't really officially introduced myself on this blog!  Since a boudoir shoot is such a personal experience, I thought I’d give you a glimpse of who I am behind the camera.  

My first career was in the film business, where I got to work alongside many high profile photographers, filmmakers, and actors, such as Albert Watson, Al Maysles, Fred Elmes, Alec Baldwin, oh and this guy here:

This is my all time favorite photo from the filmmaking days.  I'm 2nd from the right, popping my booty for DeNiro.

I met my husband on a film set and at first, didn't like him at all!  I found him COMPLETELY annoying...until I heard him speaking Spanish (he grew up in the Dominican Republic).  That is when I realized he was *actually* very cute (I've always been a sucker for a guy with an accent).

Arle & I at a wedding in the south of france

Our daughter was born in 2016.  The morning she was born, despite feeling *off* I sent my husband to work, because, AND I QUOTE: "it's not like I'm having the baby today."  She was born 6 hours later. My husband had to borrow a car from a co-worker (sitcom-style!) to make it to the hospital in time, and if my mom wasn't around that day to take me to the hospital, I'm 99% sure I'd be the woman who had her baby in the back of a taxi.  

I was a dancer as a young girl.  At a certain point I decided that I didn't want to pursue dance professionally because the pressure of that world had begun taking the joy out of it for me.  I also knew in my heart that I didn't quite have the drive or skill to really make it.  But it is still one of my most beloved hobbies and had a big impact on my childhood.  Ballet and jazz were mostly my thing, but I can also still tap dance (insert *jazz hands here*)

And speaking of jazz hands... I'm kind of a cheeseball.  I have always loved performing on stage, and will never hide from a camera.  During your Brooklyn Boudoir photoshoot, I will make cheesy jokes to inspire true laughter.  (I'd like to think you're laughing with me but I'm sure there's a little bit of laughing AT me behind the scenes as well).  I’ll demonstrate each pose and we will laugh together when it feels awkward AF because let’s be real, we don't often point our toes or dramatically arch our backs in real life. 

my signature shooting pose

I have an awesomely strong group of girlfriends whom I love dearly.  Seven of them I met in college (Shout out College of William & Mary!) and 2 of them I have known since preschool!  We are quite literally spread all around the country - NYC, New Jersey, LA, Chicago, Florida, Boston & Virginia!  I have photographed all of the college girls but the preschool friends are waiting until next year so they can do a "40 and fabulous" shoot. (Yep, I just outed my age, no shame here, age is just a number!)

photo credit Maggie Harkov

I love to travel and would chose a city over a beach any day.  Not to say I don't like beaches or mountains, but me & nature... not really the best of friends.  Paris, Rome, Buenos Aires, New York... these are the places I feel most at home. That said, I love a good adventure.  My most memorable trip was an South American odyssey through Chile, Argentina, Bolivia and Peru. 

At the Atacama Desert in Chile

I come from a big Greek Family.  If you are greek, you already know what this means. If you aren't greek but have seen *that* movie, you can pretty much get the idea.  My family is not far off from that.  For real.  We went to see "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" as an entire clan - 25 deep! - and the best part was how my Papou (grandfather) walked out saying, "why is this funny?"  

My big greek family traveling in a pack in Crete.  That's me in all white in the front row.

I love food!  I am cooking more in my daily life now that I have a kid (and am actually starting to enjoy it) but I REALLY love dining out.  My favorite is a tasting menu - with wine pairing of course! - so I can try a little of everything and get something I may not have ordered on my own. I also firmly believe "when in Rome..."  You'll never catch me ordering pizza in Paris or chicken at a seafood restaurant!

I am obsessed with good eyebrows, black jumpsuits, collecting old cameras, have seen every Madonna concert that has come through New York since 1997, and am on an ongoing search for the perfect jean. 

I’m not just some faceless brand.  Brooklyn Boudoir is my first baby, conceived shortly before my daughter was. ;)  If you check out my instagram, you'll see I walk the walk and post personal boudoir photos in addition to photos of my gorgeous clients. I want you to know me as much as I want to know you, because a portrait is as much about the relationship between photographer and subject as it is about the subject herself.  So when you book a Brooklyn Boudoir shoot, I will take the time to get to know you. You'll start off as a client but after our pre-shoot consultations, our shoot, the reveal and the product drop off, you'll see that we'll become friends. 

I pretty much always have a camera in my hands.

I LOVE shooting portraits of women, especially boudoir portraits.  I love meeting women from all walks of life and helping them feel great about themselves though their photoshoot.  I love helping women remember who they are as a woman - not just a mom/boss/girlfriend/doer of all things - by helping them reconnect with their sensuality. I love delveoping relationships with my clients so their portraits go beyond pretty pictures -- I want to capture your true self, so that you can look at your prints years from now and feel that same rush of pleasure, pride and badassness you felt after your shoot, over how incredible you look AND MORE IMPORTANTLY how incredible you ARE.  

What are some things you want me to know about you?  Comment below and let's chat! 

Boudoir + Body Image | The Effervescent Ms. L | Brooklyn Boudoir Photographer

I've been holding onto these photos for quite some time, partly because I've been crazy busy these past few months, and partly because I really want to do this woman justice.  She has an important story to tell, and we had a really special connection, so I really wanted this blog post to be RIGHT. 

I think many of you will identify with Ms. L's story. So often we hear about plus-sized women who are having a hard time feeling comfortable in their own skin. The less-told story is that of the thin girl who ALSO struggles to feel good about her body.  Body dysmorphia has nothing to do with how you actually look -- in fact, people who struggle deeply with their looks often CAN'T see themselves as they really are.  So when a thin woman is judged by her size and shape, told to "eat a sandwich," told that her insecurities are ridiculous, that she should be grateful to have such a tiny frame... frankly, it's hella disrespectful.  We have no idea what other women are dealing with on the inside, and any comments about another person's body, unless it's "you are so strong & beautiful" are in my opinion, unwelcome and unnecessary.  

OK, rant over (for now).  

Ms. L is absolutely beautiful, sassy, outgoing and real... she is the woman you could become instant best friends with (like I did).  You would never peg her for someone who struggled with her looks, but like so many of us, Ms. L has struggled with body issues.  She wanted to have a boudoir shoot to challenge her negative thoughts and try to gain more appreciation of her body, and I am so, SO honored I was able to be a part of that journey with her. 

In her words:

This was by far the most incredible, empowering experience I have been through and one that holds the most special place in my heart in NYC. To not only feel comfortable in my own skin, when most times I do not, but to form a friendship through this photo shoot truly means the world to me. Life is too short, though all the negativity and anxieties in life, it is so necessary to have a positive outlet. Going through this experience with Stephanie leaves me speechless in the best way possible.  I LOVED receiving the "teaser" photo within 1 day of the shoot. I actually had tears because it was so beautiful, and it made me view myself a way I have never viewed myself before. 

PHEW. Are YOU misty-eyed?!  I am. 

I'm no psychologist, but while it may seem counter-intuative to have a boudoir shoot when you're not feeling the best about your body, I would say it's actually the PERFECT time to reset your thoughts, shake things up and give yourself permission to feel GREAT about yourself.  I'm not saying you will be cured of all that ails you.  But I can promise you that you'll walk away from a shoot with a new pep in your step and appreciation for your own fierceness.  By seeing yourself through my lens, my hope is that you will be able to see yourself more clearly and understand your true beauty.   

I'll be writing more about tackling your insecurities through boudoir in other posts.  In the meantime, the moral of the story is, OWN IT. Celebrate yourself.  YOU DESERVE IT.  Ms. L did....and as you can see the results were S T U N N I N G. 

xoxo, Stephanie

Ready to lose the negative self-talk and see yourself in a whole new light?  Email me at stephanie@brooklynboudoir.com or hit me up here.  

Five More Minutes | Thoughts on Motherhood | Brooklyn Boudoir Photographer

I have a new alarm clock.  It’s a 2 year who wakes up at 6:35am on the dot every day without fail saying, “Mama come in… come in Mama…please Mama, come IN” at regular intervals, gaining volume for 30 minutes straight until I come to terms with the fact that there is no such thing as a snooze button anymore. (my husband is somehow blissfully and annoyingly unaware of this new alarm clock). 

And so the day begins, hoping I remembered to set the coffee machine to start the night before, getting the babe changed, fed, dressed, and out the door in time, trying to put my own self together without her getting at my makeup, answering my husbands 10 million questions about the day (including what the weather will be, as if he has no other way of finding out...) and suddenly it’s 9a and I am (already!) worn out.  There’s nothing like running around town with a top knot (and not the fashion-week kind) and a purse filled with raisins to help us forget that we are intelligent, indepndant and desirable women with layers, personality, and a life outside of school drop off.

For years I’ve been an avid reader of Brooklyn Blogger Joanna Goddard, who recently joked about motherhood on her blog: “Everyone here wants to touch my boobs for different reasons, but kind of the same reason.”  This rang SO TRUE for me.  I think about it all the time and share it with all of my other mom friends, to which everyone busts out laughing, then turns inwards and nods quietly to themselves. 

Being the center of everyone’s universe is a double-edged sword: on one hand it's so sweet & flattering, truly the greatest blessing, AND ALSO it's the most taxing, stressful, and exhausting experience. If you hope to survive it, not to mention find joy in it, then you need to care for yourself.
 

After drop off, a full day of work, deadlines that never end, pick up, dinner, baths, story times, and then back to the computer for more work that I could not finish in my work day, I am often too tired to do anything for me, other than put on my pj’s and go to sleep, knowing that tomorrow will be a similar grind. I found myself taking absurdly long showers just to get “5 more minutes” (my daughter’s current favorite negotiating phrase) to myself.  And then I realzied — this is crazy!  I shouldn’t have to hide in the bathroom to allow myself some ME time!  And I resolved to start making more time on the regular to look after MYSELF with the same care I look after my daughter & husband.

We moms share so much in common. Yes, you are a caregiver but you are also fierce, you are proud, you are resilient.  You’ve brought life into this world and most likely struggled to do so (even with the stongest epidural) and there is NOTHING more amazing than that. We love and care for our children, sacrifice our time, energy and money for our families, and too often put ourselves last — especially when prioritizing personal wants, needs, and desires.  There’s only so much we have to give and we shouldn’t forget to give to ourselves.

It’s not like I’m disappearing for hours on end, or partying into the night. Sometimes it’s as simple as taking a walk around the block by myself to listen to a podcast, an afternoon having a glass of wine with a friend I never get to see anymore (because she is probably also a mom in the same boat) or shutting myself in the bedroom to reading a book (read: trashy magazine) for an hour.  

It doesn’t always come easy.  I still worry if my daughter will feel abandoned, or end up at school with 2 different shoes on her feet because I tasked my husband to get her dressed in the morning.  But the truth is, EVERYONE in our house is better off when I feel like myself, as opposed to a strung-out, harried juggler.  Even a small amount of time helps revitalize and enrgize me.   I find myself appreciating my daughter and husband more, smiling more, being more productive at work, feeling more satisfied with life in general and even wanting to have sex to more!

Well ladies, I encourage you — hell, I CHALLENGE you — to resolve to honor yourself: that beautiful, seductive, alluring, phenomenal woman you know you are.  There are big ways and small ways to do this.  I’ll tell you, one fantastic way to do this is by treating yourself to a boudoir session. Boudoir is a classy, elegant way to show off your sexier side and celebrate the beauty of YOU!

At Brooklyn Boudoir I love taking beautiful portraits of women.  But that’s only part of it.  The other, equally important thing that I give my clients is a few hours that’s just for them.  You get to feel beuatiful, have a glass of wine and enjoy the feelings of freedom and womanhood.  You get pampered.  You'll walk away with a pep in your step that maybe you haven’t felt for awhile.  Fast forward 2 weeks to your reveal when you get to see your photos for the first time… I have had women cry seeing them because they can’t beleive the woman in the photos is them.  Because the photos show them that they ARE still beautiful, and yes, also sexy.  That they ARE a sensual person, a feminine powerhouse, AND ALSO a boss/wife/mom.  YOU CAN BE ALL THOSE THINGS!  For the first time in maybe a long time they see themseves the way they used to and begin to feel that *spark* again.  They are energized and proud, and after we hug goodbye, I see my clients walk away with a new twinkle in their eye.  

And THEN, on top of it all, you get to hold on to those images in an album or a piece of wall art to remind you of who you are when you need it. Trust me: there isn’t anything like seeing a portrait of yourself looking and feeling your very best to inspire even the most tired women. 

Ladies — it’s still in there.  When you take care of yoruself, you start to remember who you really are at your core, and you can be a better caretaker for others.  You’ll be more present with your kids, feel warmer towards your partner, smile more to the other parents and pickup.  And when you FEEL good, you really do look your best.  

So Happy Mother’s Day to all the hard working, strong, badass mothers out there.  You are doing great.  And you deserve to be pampered, not just on mother’s day, but every day.  

xoxo, Stephanie

Ready to pamper yourself a bit?  Contact me and let's schedule your boudoir session!

Photo Credits: Keturah Davis Photography

Smart, Sporty & Sexy | NYC Valentine's Day Boudoir Photoshoot

The email, phone & text correspondence leading up to Miss W's boudoir experience told me that we were going to have a fabulous time way before we even met.  She wanted to gift her husband a sexy valentine's day present and had a myriad of amazing wardrobe options she wanted to capture herself in.  

She was so excited, and attitude is EVERYTHING when it comes to making the absolute most of your shoot.   I knew well before meeting her that we were going to make some magic together.  We had our location booked, wardrobe selected aaaaannnnd... then a few days before our session she got the flu. UGH. 

Fortunately we were able to reschedule her boudoir shoot for a few weeks later, but not in time for her album to arrive before V-Day.  So instead, we gifted him a little teaser on Valentine's Day and gave him the full album a few weeks later.  Miss K videoed him opening his gift, and trust me when I say his reaction was PRICELESS -- surprised, intrigued, delighted, not to mention in awe of his smokin' hot wife and her stealthy moves keeping the photoshoot a secret from him.  I love that I got to see that - it kept me smiling for days.  

This woman was so awesome, we had an absolute blast, and I'm obsessed with her final images. They show off her personality and her other... ahem... assets so well.  Here's what Miss W had to say about her photo session:

I was made to feel comfortable right away, like I was speaking to an old friend. You were honest and so helpful with the direction of the shoot and were so open to all the ideas that I had. I didn't feel shy and it was an amazing experience to see my ideas combined with your artful eye in the final photos. Even if you don't have a boyfriend or husband you should do this as it was such an amazing and empowering experience. I can't explain the excitement that I had between my reveal and when I finally was able to share my photos with my husband (obviously he loved them as well). I also was so happy to share his reaction with you as you were such an integral part in keeping this a special secret for him. This became something for my husband and something for me... a chance to encapsulate me now - a me that I am proud of (not to be mushy lol). The advice would give another woman is I let go and just relish the moment. 

My heart is bursting. What a sweetheart (not to mention a BABE!). She was lovely inside and out and it was an absolute honor to work with her to capture her femininity, her personality, and her badassness. Thank you, Miss W, for joining the Brooklyn Boudoir club. I adore you.  

xoxo, Stephanie

It's never too early to start planning for NEXT Valentine's Day ;)  Contact me to plan your shoot!

Behind the Scenes of a Boudoir Party | Destination Boudoir Photographer

I recently took a trip to New Orleans with a few of my closest girlfriends in celebration of our knowing each other for TWENTY (20!) years.  We met in college and are now spread all over the country -- LA, Chicago, Brooklyn New York (holla!), New Jersey, Florida, Boston & Virginia, AND we are all moms, so it's particularly rare & special when we are all able to get together. We hit up Bourbon Street, ate some incredible food, drank A LOT of excellent wine, went to a huge Mardi Gras ball and of course, I took the opportunity to photograph all of these beautiful women. 

Admittedly, not all of my friends were initially enthusiastic about having their own boudoir shoot.  I heard many of the same concerns/excuses I hear from some clients -- they wanted to lose a few pounds first, they didn't know how to be sexy,  they said they didn't photograph well ... but then just as with all the other women I've photographed, they shed their insecurities and self-doubts within the first few minutes of being in front of my lens and were THRILLED when they saw their images at the reveal (this was right before Valentine's Day so I dare say their partners were thrilled as well.)  

After the individual shoots, we took a few group shots together.  I'm absolutely in love with them. We are all nearly 40 (plus or minus a year), and while we're all different, we are all smart, fierce, fabulous and full of love. 

SO. MUCH. FUN.

Check out this fun behind the scenes video of our shoot.  Video by Ashley Glacel.

See how much fun everyone is having?  Many women think a boudoir shoot is going to be an intimidating experience, but in reality it's very comfortable!  We laugh a lot and it is a really fun time for all involved.  These women have inspired me for years, so it was incredibly meaningful for me to give something back to them -- to capture them as they are now, help them realize their beauty, feel their sensuality, give their partner's a kick, and make them feel like they're 20 again...only better.  

Maybe we're rocking a few extra pounds between us, maybe we go to bed at the same time we used to head out for the night 20 years ago, maybe our smiles lines have deepened a bit, but we also have a hell of a lot more experience & wisdom behind our eyes, and THAT is something a 19 year old simply can not possess.  Collectively we are more confident, more comfortable with ourselves and I truly believe more beautiful than ever.  I'm proud of us, and feel so privileged to be part of this tribe.

xoxo, Stephanie

Ready to celebrate with YOUR tribe?   Email me or contact me below about a boudoir party for you and your closest friends.

Single This Valentine's Day? Celebrate YOU! | Brooklyn Boudoir Photography

Women choose boudoir photography for all sorts of reasons. It’s certainly a popular gift for a significant other, but at Brooklyn Boudoir, I say, do it for your own.damn.self.  You will get beautiful images of yourself, yes, but it’s actually so much more than that.  It can be a meaningful way to mark a milestone birthday, a pregnancy, the arrival of a baby, or to celebrate a recent improvement to your life.  Most of all, it’s about celebrating and embracing your womanhood and capturing yourself exactly how you are at this very moment. Oh, and it’s also a hella lot of fun.  So this Valentine’s day, I urge all the single ladies out there to celebrate themselves with a boudoir portrait session. Need some convincing?  Here are a few reasons why you should consider a Brooklyn Boudoir photo shoot:

Celebrate Your Single Life
Valentine’s Day can be tough on single people, but it doesn’t have to be. Toss out the pre-conceived notions of what makes a good Valentine’s Day —you don’t need candy, flowers, or a fancy dinner to feel appreciated.  Why not celebrate being a strong, single woman and relish the terrific, rich life you have built for yourself?  Even better, gather your single women friends and book a group photography session!  I’m about to do this myself in New Orleans with a group of women I have known for 20 years.  Believe me, you’ll leave feeling like you can conquer the world, and you might just be the envy of your non-single friends. 

Banish Your Body Issues

Society has twisted the concept of beauty into something virtually unattainable, and our collective body image has paid a steep price. EVERYONE has insecurities, and we often spend too much time focusing on what we don’t like about our bodies. Instead, why not focus on what you love about yourself?  As a boudoir photographer, I sincerely see beauty in every woman -- that means YOU!  You are perfect just as you are. Not on a “skinny day,” not after you get in shape.   My hope is that by seeing yourself through my lens, you’ll be able to see yourself in a way you perhaps never have before, and that in itself is a reason to celebrate.

You’ll Look & Feel Amazing

Who doesn’t love getting primped, and how often do we allow ourselves such a luxury in our busy lives?  Part of the fun of a Brooklyn Boudoir Experience is getting pampered by my amazing hair & makeup team, which offers a chance to unwind before the session and indulge in a real treat.  Prefer to do your own hair & makeup? TOTALLY FINE!  Don’t wear makeup, period?  I fully support you!  I want you to look like the best version of you, not to feel as if you are playing dress up in someone else’s eyelashes.  Makeup or not, the sudden surge of self-confidence you’ll feel after your session will make you want to go out and celebrate how amazing you look and feel.  

Embrace Your Inner Goddess

OK, “goddess” isn’t a word I often use, as overused as it is right now.  BUT hear me out.  A big part of boudoir photography is, of course, the sensual nature of it.  I am proud to be a sensual being and encourage all women to embrace and celebrate the sensual and yes - sexual - expression of themselves, however you choose to express that. If you don’t engage that aspect of your personality very often, it can be very powerful to remind yourself of it.  You might find that the photography session reignites a spark within you that you can carry with into many other aspects of your life. You think Beyonce looks at herself in the mirror and tells herself she is anything short of a goddess?  My bet is she doess’t, and neither should you. 

Do It Because It Scares You

We easily fall into certain habits in our daily life, completing the same tasks at work or wearing the same hairstyle or outfits. Comfort and routine can make us stale; it can kill productivity and imagination.  Sometimes it’s good to take a leap of faith, even if it terrifies you. We grow as people when we’re challenged, and that includes trying new things. That’s why it’s important to sometimes engage in something that makes you feel a little uncomfortable.   When you stretch yourself and try something new, you’ll find a new appreciation for life again. Imagine the terrific sense of self-confidence and empowerment you will gain from your boudoir session!  

It’s Fine Art
Under the care of the photographer’s trained eye, boudoir photography is much more than just sexy pictures. It’s a work of art, worthy of hanging in a gallery, and you play the starring role. Every grown woman should have a photo of herself looking her fiercest casually (or not so casually!) displayed in her home.  Plus, you have an amazing keepsake of your experience and a lifelong reminder of how beautiful you are, inside and out.

Ladies, boudoir is having a moment right now, and for good reason.  DO IT FOR YOU — and there is no better time than now.  Want to learn more?  Hit me up!  

xoxo, Stephanie

Loving Yourself | New York Bridal Boudoir Photography

On this second day of the new year… the day that we all have to get back to the “real” world, I’d like to share a little inspiration and practical advice regarding the most important and meaningful love of your life…

YOU.

Loving yourself can seem like a vague idea, indulgent or even unnecessary. But it’s vital. Putting self love into practice and creating habits that fill you up is key to a fulfilled life. Daily self love will make you a better human, mother, wife… a better you.  It’s like going to the gym. (I think. I don’t go to the gym, so I don’t really know.)

I’m fortunate enough to have photographed amazing women who have become friends – mothers, entrepreneurs, single ladies, working ladies… all loving, nurturing, evolved humans who value the art of self love.  Ms. M is one of them women who really captured my heart in 2017.  Smart & successful but also sensitive and emotional, I saw a lot of myself in her.  

Ms. M initially contacted me a few months before her wedding.  Yes, there would be the extra added benefit of gifting her groom a beautiful and personal gift, but she more importantly wanted to have a boudoir shoot to have fun and gain confidence while in the midst of the wedding-planning craziness.  As many of us know, the wedding industry can often do a number on women — setting unrealistic expectations of perfection and bringing a lot of stress to a time that should be nothing short of joyous. I mean — not many of us mere mortals look or dress like Megan Markle and — *news flash* — that’s ok!  Imagine how sad it would be to look back on yourself as a 90 year old and only then realzie how beautiful you were.  The thought breaks my heart.  Ms. M wanted to have a boudoir shoot to give herself a day off, have fun and remind herself that she is beautiful and sexy exactly as she is now, in this moment.  And THAT to me is the crux boudoir photography.  There is no need to wait for some arbitray goal - you are allowed to love yourself and appreciate yourself just as you are today, and every day!

We shot at the William Vale, one of my favirite Brooklyn hotels in Williamsburg, which overlooks the New York City skyline.  We wanted to capture Ms. M looking sexy, stylish & fun, and Ms. M really went for it.  She pushed herself outside of her comfort zone, and was game for anything I suggested.  It was a late summer day, the light was gorgeous and we captured Ms. M looking beautiful, bold, confidant, and sexy as hell.  

After her shoot, Ms. M said: 

Thank you again SO much for such an amazing experience. … I had fun and felt fabulous every step of the way and that was due in large part to your creativity, careful guidance, and boundless energy.  I really cannot say enough about what this whole experience has done for me and for my confidence going into my wedding/the rest of my life in general -- you are an absolute gift and I feel so lucky to have met you and had a chance to shoot with you!

What can I say, this was a total lovefest of a collaboration.  I really could have photographed her all day — luckily she had the stamina to shoot for almost 4 hours with me!  I think we both needed a massage the next day but it was so worth it!  We had a blast together and hearing I applaud Miss "S" for not only stepping out of her comfort zone, but for proudly sharing these lovely photos with the world to encourage other women to embrace the experience for THEMSELVES. 

I told Ms. M that I would happily photographer her again for he 1 year wedding anniversary and I am very much looking forward to that day!  

xoxo, Stephanie

Ready to celebrate yourself in 2018?  Let's chat!